Family - A domestic affair !

“No man is poor who has a Godly mother.”
― Abraham Lincoln

 

Mom standing in a corner with huge tears in her eyes as if she is sure that she will never see you again. Kids hugs you at the rate of 10 times a minute, some of them being so intense that you are unable to breathe. Your dad is going in and out of the garage hauling your luggage while periodically screaming things like “Car! ASAP!”, “We are late! Let’s move!” “How hard can it be to get yourself in the car?!” etc. etc.

 

Then he looks at mom while passing her and screams in her ear: “We can cry at the airport, let’s get in the car first” which changes mother’s tears to anger and they start arguing which actually relieves you because it is a good distraction for your mother, at least for the time being.

 

So the screaming and the sobbing and the hugs and the tears continue while you make your way to the airport. Everyone sees you off like you are going on the voyage to never-land from where your chances of coming back are slim. Yeah, you see, I have a very supportive family.

 

And any consolation in your part will only be dealt with anger.

 

“Mom I am just going a couple hundred miles away, Its just a two hour flight. I will be back in May/June. It’s not like you are not going to see me for years!” I tried while hugging her.

"What rubbish! You come once a year and that too for a few days".

“Mom I was here for a month!” I try again.

"what month?! one month in a whole year!” she declares.

 

And the argument goes on...

 

Sometimes it bothers me because my family can create a scene and the airport, for one, is not the easiest places to find your way around because neither the people are friendly nor the staff courteous. You can’t do much with your mom sobbing, your dad freaking out and kids hugging rate and intensity continuously increasing by the minute.

 

I take a sigh of relief when I pass the security checkpoint and actually leave them behind. After that finding my way to the Gate becomes so much easier...
.... what about them???

खोज - QUEST !

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I'll come across these photographs again was not at all anticipated. It appears like I’m looking back that one moment to retrospect or to romanticize my past...

Hey, what are YOU thinking ? Am I looking like busy in styling my hairs? Noticing what pimples are doing on my face? Dark circles under my eyes? Looking tired OR realizing that I have lost weight a lot & now looking fit-n-fine ;-)?

 

Or I’m trying to breathe onto a mirror just to make sure I’m still alive….

 

Am I thinking to own the mirror that really reflects me as a person; not just renewing my fitness club membership…?

 

?????

 

Fact is - man's imagination also runs wild ... and imaginary stories don't have anywhere to go. If only the feelings they brought were also imaginary.... Perhaps, I'm proving it & in this photograph (rather mirror) I’m urging to know the people (rather TRUE people :-)) I am accompanied with (or just walking all alone?).

The life we live is different at all the points we meet and know the people. It's amazing how intricately we knew these people once. They shared a part of their lives with us and we shared some of ours. Some we knew only for a few months, some we knew for years, some we had crushes on, and some we almost thought would turn out to be close friends. But they didn't. Sometimes we can’t see who is actually in front of us, because they are right behind us. So it’s necessary to look at the mirror to know the TRUE people around. Not only a front view – it gives a rear view as well even if it is broken into pieces :-).

Look in a mirror, what do you see? A reflection of U or the crowd U like?...

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Sometimes I write because I'm HAPPY... :-)

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[Sometimes I write because I'm HAPPY. Sometimes I become HAPPY because I choose to write. :-)]

 

Last night. Last night, I was little sad. Sad in a surprised way. Sad in a 'now-what?' 'how come?' state.

 

There were some amount of thoughts playing in my mind, each trying to suppress the other. I had a strange apprehension, possibly because there is a certain limit to which the mind can accommodate conflicts. That made me hungry and filled up every thought in my mind. Started questioning myself – 'how can I be so carefree'. But you have been honest and noble. You, made me realize that it is an event in life when you fail, you become fearless. It feels good because the entire process is a path to self discovery.

 

"You haven't been sad in a while, and this realization came to you when you started thinking about it. This is just another event – yes another event, which will not determine the rest of your life. Think about the beautiful day you had; you have a freedom tonight and a beautiful Sunday morning is waiting for you." – your words came true as if you had scripted the event. :p

 

There is a fine line between happiness and sadness. It's always evident when we are crossing from happiness to sadness. But, somehow we don't realize when we cross that line from sadness to happiness. Perhaps this the reason why we don't appreciate our happiness, and complain when we are sad. We are so accustomed to complaining about sadness that at some point it comes naturally to us - like muscle memory - a reflex action. Perhaps sadness wouldn't be so bad if we appreciated the happy moments in life. Sadness wouldn't be so hurtful if we believed that we could be happy again, just like we were before. A few setbacks don't determine our worth, let alone our happiness in life.

 

One morning you wake up and suddenly the sun is shining. It is faint because the mind is still aware of the chill, but the heart feels warm. You rediscover yourself and the happiness which you have overlooked for a long time. Then there is a smile on your face. :-)

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tODAY iS nOT tHE dAY !

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I remember – one weekend I started my day with a photograph. A photograph; telling me that ONLY the photograph belongs to me. Though it did not say where or when – but I am not unaware. I know it was some time in the afternoon time when we all were enjoying each others company. No self-possessiveness, no boundaries. The 'where' / 'when' doesn't matter to me. What matters to me now is 'the character'. The character is no more with me. At least that's what I could think of that day. I found an easy way out. Not facing the situation, not dealing with the issues, added a 'pause' into life. Good for both (?). She wouldn't have to deal with my millions of questions. She has opted to stay away, somewhere far away, let her. Perhaps somewhere better.

For the next few days, I stayed at home. I kept staring at that photograph, thinking that perhaps I am just over-reading the situation. If I just read/feel it one more time, I will get a different meaning out of it, and will realize how silly I am to have misunderstood that we are not together. But that didn't happen no matter how many times I tried. Some things really aren't in our control. What's done is done. Some things we just have to live no matter how much pain it causes. Some choices/events we must accept.

Yet, a part of me still thinks that if I go back enough to the past, I will somehow magically change the situation. That too will change soon enough. Perhaps, some day I won't look at it at all. Perhaps someday I will forget about the photograph and it's character too. BUT - Today is not that day.

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a little far away, but not out of our reach...

Not just a poem !

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Poem "The Cookie Thief" written by Valerie Cox and read by Wayne Dyer !

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Mx-aErLF5k

You Tube version of this Poem :-

 

 

 

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It raises mixed feelings in my heart & mind every time I read it. It is such a great lesson in character.

 

How many times in our lives,
have we absolutely known
that something was a certain way,
only to discover later that
what we believed to be true ... was not?

 

[Don't rush into a judgement unless u see the end !!]

Your shadow tells that you still exist...

Afternoon time...but a long one.

 

Hey, it’s U. Yes U. Of course it’s ur shadow.. mine as well. Neither of us can deny this fact. Just a shadow or a reflection of each other [Think ! Not to be answered.] ?

Reflections/shadows - they are honest. They appear just the way they really are (always dark, so predictable). They don't try to be sweet, or pretty, or happy when they are not. No matter how much we lie to ourselves, our shadow will always be there to show us what's really there. There is neither pompous nor pretentious about shadows.

Though shadow always follows us, let’s cast a shadow on something wherever we stand - not by moving from place to place (person to person). Choose a place where you are well-off - yes, choose a place where you are very much calm, easy, happy & relaxed, & stand in it for all you are worth, facing the sunshine.

You know what -  our shadow always tells us that we still exist. Let’s not just carry our lives through a mirror to get rid of shadows. One thing I love about little kids they always notice their shadows. Don’t know why as adults we forget.

“What would your good do if evil didn't exist, and what would the earth look like if all the shadows disappeared?”

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